April 15, 2007 At Saint Mark Church in Norman, OK
Acts 15:12-16 + Psalm 118 + Revelation 1:9-11, 12-13, 17-19 + John 20: 19-31
What John’s Gospel explores in the experience of Thomas is not about doubt, but about faith and how one comes to it. Thomas has been absent for whatever reason. Who can judge or explain what grief will cause and how someone filled with grief will behave? They were all grief stricken. Who can judge or explain what fear will cause and how someone willed with fear will behave? They were all frightened. For some reason which I suspect is rooted in grief and fear, Thomas has not been there with the others on the first day of the week.
Those who have been together on the first day of the week believe and are filled with faith in the presence of Christ. Their faith has come from an experience of understanding. Together they have begun to understand and grasp the meaning of the death of Jesus. How did they do that? From being there together and from their pouring over those ancient scriptures that was always a part of their gatherings. Consequently, for them, “Seeing the Lord” was not a matter of physical sighting. It was an awareness expressed as we so often do when we reflect with wonder and memory and finally something dawns on us and becomes obvious. We still say: “I see what you mean.”
This “seeing” in John’s Gospel is code language for knowing the revelation of Christ at such a depth that life is changed.
Thomas was not there, and so he did not come to see until he arrived. At which time, a struggle takes place: is faith a matter of the brain, intellect, or is it a matter of experience? It would seem from what went on between them that no amount of conversation, talking or convincing was going to matter or bring Thomas to faith. It had to be a matter of experience. What did he experience there; a vision, an apparition, or a revelation? Which would you prefer? Which would lead you to faith? We see things all the time, but we do not always know what they mean.
The assembled disciples had come to read the signs of the open wounds in the hands and side of Christ. Those wounds were openings through which they could perceive or see into the interior life of Jesus Christ. They were and still are a way in. That wound in his side was like a birth channel from which in nature blood and water flow at the time of birth. That wound in his side is a birth passage into his heart, into the inner reality that he is; and they came to understand. They “got it.” They were finally able to “see” what he was and what they were because of it.
Thomas you notice never does really touch anything. What he experiences there in the company of his believing friends leads him to see the channel available to an inner life with God. That coming of Christ in their midst seems to be a regular happening. Every first day of the week Jesus is with them. When they gather, he gathers with them. The doors are locked. He emerges from within them, and when Thomas is with them, He is present to Thomas.
What Jesus encourages Thomas to do is not touch flesh, but to reach for the divine; to look at wounds, at suffering, at the scars of violence and the evil of hatred and see into them something of God. It did not start in his brain or with his intellect. It started with his desire to be in the assembly and with his willingness to look at the wounds and brokenness his own lack of faith and courage had allowed. He had spoken with such bravado and macho courage when Jesus spoke of his coming agony. But he did nothing to stop it, and in fact, during the whole time of agony, trial and persecution, we never even hear that was on the scene.
Thomas came to believe by spiritually grasping the meaning of the death and suffering of Jesus. Through that understanding and his experience among fellow believers, he received the divine life that is stronger than death. So maybe it be for all of us here on this first day of the week, and may the transformation of our lives make others at least a little curious.